"Hike Up Your Pants" from Daddy-O
Transcribed by Bryan Lambert, Ed Hughes, Donna K. Lang, and Lisa Jenkins
[On the satellite:]

JOEL: Hey everybody, do the pants up song!

TOM: Now!

JOEL: Dad 'n Lad, Farrahs, Levis, Bugle Boys
Sans-a-Belt, Chinos, Haggar, Ban-Rol,
Arnold Palmer, Wrangler, Johnny Carson, Huskies
No pants are higher than mine.

Hah! Oh! Look out! Don't touch this!

TOM: Hah!

JOEL: Hike up your britches, super high now.
Cut off the circulation, to your thighs now.
Yank your trousers higher than Corey Haim's, oh wow.

TOM: Hu hoo! Hah!

JOEL: 'Cause it ain't hip 'til you're in total pain.

TOM: Whooo!

JOEL: Hike up your pants till you see your shins,
Wear an Izod shirt like a second skin.
Make sure you wear your belt buckle to the side.
Hike up your pants, take your butt cheeks for a ride.

TOM: Hey!

JOEL: Hike, Hike, Hike, up your Chinos
Hike, Hike, Hike, up your Farrahs
Hike, Hike, Hike, up your Haggars
Hike up your britches like mine.... Take it Frank!

TOM: Whoooo!

[In Deep 13:]

FRANK: Hike, Hike, Hike, Hike your pants up
Hike, Hike, Hike...with the thing, and, uh...
Hike, Hike, Hike...with the football...
Hike, Hike...

Take it, Doctor!

[continues singing in background]

DR. FORRESTER: I'm not taking anything, Frank! Here, I'll take these. [Pulls pants over Frank's head, Frank keeps "hiking" through fly.] And you! Pants Weasel! Get on with it! Zip it, Frank.

[On the satellite:]

JOEL: Hike, Hike, Hike, up your Ban-Rols
Hike, Hike, Hike, up your Roebucks
Hike, Hike, Hike, up your Toughskins
Hike up your britches like mine! Hah!
Hike up your britches like mine! Hah!
Hike up your britches like mine! Hah! Oh yeah, look out!
Hike up my britches like mine! Jump back, kiss myself!

[continues singing]

TOM: Uh, Joel, take the commercial sign. Joel!

JOEL: Hike up your britches like mine!

I can't come back--I don't know how it works!

CROW: Joel! Joel! Commercial sign! Snap out of it, buddy!

TOM: Oh no! He's vapor locked! Hit the button, Crow! Hit the button!

CROW: I'll get it! Ungh!

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