"Michael Feinstein's Gamera"
from Gamera vs. Guiron
Transcribed by Amanda Cameron and Lisa Jenkins
[In Deep 13:]
[Closeup of sign announcing:
Appearing tonite in Deep 13
Michael Feinstein
"Just Cole Porter
...and Me"
Piano plays as camera pans away from sign.]
FEINSTEIN: Anyway, he got his start getting cigarettes to Agnus
Demille, if you can believe that.
FRANK: Oh, ho, ho!
FEINSTEIN: But, anyway, back to my original story which was that
I think Oscar Hamerstein spent TWO WEEKS up at his
buck county farm writing the lyrics to "Oh, What a Beautiful
Morning." And he labored over it and he turns it over to Dick
Rogers who sits down and promptly--in ten minutes, mind
you--writes the melody. And I don't have to tell you two gentlemen
that American musical theater was never quite the same thing.
FRANK: What a WONDERFUL story!
DR. FORRESTER: Uh, tell us that story about Cole Porter again.
FRANK: Oh, please do!
FEINSTEIN: Should I? Really? Okay. Well, Cole Porter, in,
during his horse-riding accident, well, he was laying in the middle
of the woods with his legs crushed, yelling for help, he decided
to write "The Long Last Love."
FRANK: Oh, no!
FEINSTEIN: That's a true story, but what a lot of people don't
know is that the lyrics were altered for its Broadway opening,
yes. And the original lyrics went something like this:
[Plays a haunting tune.]
Very tender.
[Pounds on piano.]
Oh my God! I'm in so much pain! Somebody please help me!
Somebody come and save me!
FRANK: What an ENCHANTING anecdote!
DR. FORRESTER: They don't write them like that anymore, do
they?
FEINSTEIN: They certainly do not.
DR. FORRESTER: How does the Gamera theme song stack up against
songs from yesteryear?
FEINSTEIN: Oh, it's interesting you should ask that because the
opening lyric of the Gamera theme song has sort of a Rogers and
Hart feel to it. Let me show you what I mean.
[plays piano and sings]
Gamera--
[plunk, plunk, plunk, plunk]
Gamera--
[tra la la la, tra la la la]
Gamera is really neat.
Gamera is filled with meat.
We all love you, Gamera.
But then the second part is a little more fun. It has a sort of
George and Ira Gershwin feel to it.
Shell,
Teeth,
Eyes,
Claws,
Scales,
Breath,
Fun.
It sort of sneaks up on you. "Boo," it says.
[plays piano and sings]
Gamera's enchantment still grows.
He fills our hearts with love.
Gamera's the latest thing.
He fills our hearts with spring, spring, spring!
Anytime you want some moonbeams,
[whispered]
Gamera is the thing.
[plays piano and sings]
Gamera is really neat,
He is filled with turtle meat.
We all love you, GAMERA!!!
DR. FORRESTER: Ah! Kill him. Better yet, I'll kill him. You
push the button. [Picks up large mallet as Frank goes to push the button.]
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